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November 7, 2012

Five Things I wish I knew Before I Had My Daughter

Posted by Jenny Hart - Owner

1~ Say goodbye to paid overtime: Loving my career and putting in 10 hour days at the office was the norm. When I got pregnant with Kaiah I was thrilled and not concerned at all with my career as I thought okay, 3 months off, that's like a lifetime and I will just pick up where I left off! However, becoming a mother shifted my whole view on the world. 3 months passed so quickly, and the anxiety of returning to work and leaving my baby was just too much. There was no amount of money that would change that. I resigned from my position and stayed home with her for 10 months. When I returned to work, I struggled, like all Moms, to keep my energy balanced between being a Mom and being part of a company. Knowing this would not have change things, but being prepared for how huge this transition was might have eased the anxiety and guilt for the feelings I was having.

2~ Don't expect things will go as you choose with your birth: I wanted all natural and no birth interventions and had envisioned a slow process of breathing, walking, maybe going into a hot shower to help me through the birthing process. NOT QUITE… I asked for natural and that is what the universe gave me- the expedited version. 0 to 10c in three hours, no time for any interventions or hot showers or back rubs. My birth plan went out the window and I was begging for an epideral as soon as I got to the hospital, but was too far along to get one. I still am in awe of the process and humbled by natures strength.

3~ 40 days, 40 nights: I didn't know that planning my postpartum recovery was just as important as planning my birth. Many cultures around the world have strict guidelines and rituals to ensure that Mom and Baby can fully recover. All seem to follow a timeframe of 40 days and 40 nights ~ 6 weeks. These have been in place for hundreds of years for a reason, yet most of us in America have not made plans to have this system in our postnatal period. This is 6 weeks of real rest: Not leaving the house, not having to clean, treatments and therapies to help you recover, sleeping when your baby sleeps, bonding, getting the hang of breastfeeding, meals cooked for you and other children attended to by family and friends. I just didn't know how much I needed all of that support. By planning to have this type of support postpartum, you will recover faster and feel really ready to handle the tasks that you have to handle as a mother.

4~ Nipple Confusion?: I wish I would have known to ask for support with when to start a pacifier and bottle. I was so worried about nipple confusion with Kaiah that I strictly breastfed for 2 Months. Then, when I tried to get her to take a bottle and pacifier she was not having it and never would. She has always been very good at knowing what she wants and getting it.

5~ Hang on to you: I dived into motherhood and all of the wonderful blessings. How could I not? Kaiah is absolutely the center of my world, and there is nothing wrong with that. I just wish that I would have not left everyone else out. I lost contact with friends for a while, lost contact with who I was, my partner even. To know how important it is to continue to nurture the relationships in your life, not just for the relationship, but for the connection to the loving energy of a good friendship. You need that as a Mother.